Mar 27, 2013

Accepting the fact

I cried. Why? I realized that on this earth, there's no such thing as immortal. My family, friends, acquaintances, teachers will all die one day. Including me. If I die first, how will my parents react? How can they continue living when they lose their child? If my parents die, what will me and my sister be? With who can we lean on? If my friend dies, who will I talk to?

We have been ha ha ha and laugh laugh laugh but we don't realize that our lives are numbered by now. I feared of leaving this earth too early when I still haven't achieve anything. I want to work. I want to help my parents. I want to take care of them. But what if I die or they die? Sometimes, we just don't know how important our family can be? Look around you. You see people. They have their own families, life, love. What if someone dies? How can we cope with it?

I feared for one thing. I'm scared I don't have the time to make my family proud. My parents, are the one who bring me to this world. I want them to smile and be proud of me saying, "Finally, our daughter has grown up." I want them to cheer up. I don't want them to worry about all the bills that they have to pay for I am here, working.

Even now when I sign in Facebook or Twitter, I can't find someone who can be with me forever. We'll break up sooner or later. Life is not fair sometimes. Deep in my heart, I really feel that I am such a lonely girl. Even love isn't forever, right? Sigh. We'll end up lonely one day. Because we are not forever. We are mortal. We can die, ANYTIME.

I really hope that before I die, I will make my parents really proud of me. 'Cause I don't know when will I die or when will people around me die. The fact is, we can't live forever.

Amazing Grace,
how sweet the sound,
that save a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am I found,
was blind but now I see.